How to communicate in your marriage without making your partner feel criticized
Dr. Sarah’s son, a pilot, tells stories how after every mission, the crew provides detailed feedback as to what went well and what could have gone better. This feedback is a vital learning tool used to improve future missions.
In your relationship, take a hint from successful pilots – Learn to love feedback.
Feedback is essential!
After any outing, task, or project done together, discuss with each other about what went well and what can be improved next time. As you’re giving and receiving feedback, don’t get defensive; instead, look for opportunities to improve.
Feedback is not the same as criticism!
Unlike criticism, the goal is to make things better, not to tear your partner down.
Essentially dialogue that is feedback focuses on what went well and what each person can do differently next time. Before you say something, consider if it’s something he or she has the power to improve. If there is no possible way for him to make it better, then maybe there’s no reason to share the issue.
Consider it a victory if you hear things that you can improve on next time.
Each couple is a team!
As a team, couples face many issues they need to work through together. When you’re in a couple, you’re not flying solo; you have a co-pilot for a reason. You’re there to support each other, not to tear each other down.
Think of your relationship as your greatest mission that the two of you will ever fly together.
