Live Each Day Like a First Date

One day, before his mother died, Dr. Robert asked her what the secret was to her 50+ year relationship with her father. 

Here’s what she said,

“Every night before I go to bed, I ask myself this question: If today had been my first date with your father, do I think he would invite me out on a second date?”

It’s a simple question that packs a lot of power! 

How to Get Invited on a Second Date

When you’re married, it’s easy to forget to make yourself “dateable.” After all, you’ve already locked the relationship down, right?

The truth is, you want to make sure that you and your partner are taking the time to care for each other and your relationship. On a very real level, you want to keep dating. 

So, the question then becomes how do you get invited on a “second date” time and time again?

First, think about the things that brought you together in the first place, and focus on those things. 

Ask yourself, What did we like about each other? Likely, you laughed a lot. You told stories. You were kind to one another. You went out of your way to show each other that you care. You held hands. You flirted. 

Then, consider ways you might go about developing those kinds of intimacies again. 

If it’s been awhile since you’ve flirted, or held hands, or laughed, then it might feel awkward. That’s okay! It will get better and easier the more that you do it. Keep trying. 

Here two really important things each of you need to do to be “dateable”:

1. Make time for each other. 

   One of the most important things you can do for your relationship is to make sure you are committing to time together. Just the simple act of making time will communicate that you value each other and are a priority to one another. 

2. Talk.

   Perhaps the most important thing you can do when you spend time together is talk. 

   The top three things that people divorce over is money, sex, and poor communication. This is why making time to really talk and have good conversations is so important. This means conversations about your days, and also sharing stories, laughing, and connecting. 

Dr. Robert’s parents had a 50+ year marriage that was filled with love and devotion. 

Are you looking for the same?

Try taking Dr. Robert’s mom’s advice… and stay dateable.